Wednesday, August 29, 2018

Dave Reviews: Giant Reptile Zen

The Tea Dragon Society

For some time, Renegade Games has been held up as an example of a company that consistently puts out quality products. I'm starting to wonder if it's more a matter of them very consistently putting out products, and some of them are quality.


The art on the box is exactly like the art in the game: fucking adorable. If you want a game you can hug because it's so KAWAII, this is definitely your thing.

For everyone else, it's Fisher-Price: My First Deckbuilder. Everyone gets a character and a starter deck (differences are aesthetic only). You don't have a hand of cards; all cards are face up in your 'hold'. However, you draw cards and add them to your hold, which is functionally the same as adding them to your hand in a more normal card game. It's like the entire point is to keep the information open so you can teach kids how to play, as if you couldn't figure out playing with hands on the table if the kid's problem was struggling with what to do without advice.

Cards can have up to four parts to them. Growth is effectively mana, the resource you use to buy cards. You can find growth in the upper left (that's what she said...?). The cost of a card is in the upper right. If there's an effect, that's in the lower middle. Points are at the bottom/middle. And some icons are also in the bottom middle, while others are on the pictures, which is confusing but not a huge deal.

Your entire turn is drawing a card and, if you want to, buying a card. This at least has the effect of keeping the game moving. Your hand is sitting in front of you (that's probably what she said), and you don't throw it out every turn, so you already know how much growth you're working with (she definitely said that) minus the card you draw next. The market and memory cards are all sitting there for you to peruse, so you're considering your next play on other people's turns, which don't take long, and the game stays fairly active.

Market cards get added to your deck by using sufficient growth (do you think she said that? I do) and putting it in your discard pile. Memory cards also get added to your deck, but tend to be worth more points, have different effects, and are related to specific seasons—the game is played in four rounds, representing the seasons, and once one memory card is left you move on to the next season. When one memory card remains in winter, the game's over. Count up your points.

It's... fine. There's not much here for adults to enjoy in terms of rich strategy. Anyone who comprehends deck builders will talk more about how cute the artwork is than the game. Bump it up in priority if you have kids in the mid-single digits to whom you'd like to teach very basic game ideas. Other than that, this isn't going to entertain most people for too many playthroughs.

Score: Two and a half dragons out of four (OH GOD THE HORROR)

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